Hiei’s Terrible Mating Season
by kazumigirl
Summary: When Koto agrees to do a Dark Tournament movie that sucked the first time, she doesn't know she and Juri are in for the nightmare of their lives when they find out Hiei's in mating season...and he's after them!
1. Default Chapter

Hiei's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Mating Week

Disclaimer: dances wildly There! Now that I've danced, can I say I own it? Oh, fiddlesticks!

"Hey, Yusuke," Botan called cheerfully flying into her favorite spirit detective's room, "look what I go-ahhhhh!!!!!"

Yusuke, who had been flexing in front of the mirror butt naked, screamed and grabbed the quilt from his bed, covering himself with it like a toga.

"Botan!"

"Yusuke?!"

"What are you doing here?"

"What are you doing without clothes?"

"I asked you first! But first, step out and let me get dressed, okay?"

"Um…okay."

Botan uneasily flew back through the wall and waited until Yusuke knocked on the window. When he gave the her the "all-clear" signal, she cautiously re-entered.

Yusuke sat on his bed.

"Okay, what are you doing here?"

"Well, a demon movie producer in Makai wants to make a film based on the Dark Tournament you fought in! It'll be so great, oh Yusuke, we'll be stars!"

"Demons can make movies?"

"Of course, he wants all of you, Team Urameshi I mean, to meet back at the tournament stadium so he can show you what he's got so far!"

"Oh, he's already making it?"

"Yes!"

"Okay, I guess."

Botan threw her arms around Yusuke and ripped him onto her oar.

"Okay, the others are already there, we just need you."

When they got there, a demon wearing a business suit shook Yusuke's hand and explained about the movie. Yusuke asked him to please cut to the chase and show the film.

"Okay, folks," the producer said, "here's a clip from where Kuwabara takes a punch in the diaphragm for Yusuke-you know, the fight between Toguro and Yusuke?"

The movie clip began to play on an overhead projector the producer had bought.

__

Kuwabara (played by Tim Allen): No guys, I'm the one Toguro's after (weird Tim Allen noise)

Kurama (Sean Connery): No, we'll stay and fight together!

Hiei: (Whoopie Goldberg): I'll take on Toguro by myself if I have to

Yusuke: (Frankie Muniz): No, don't do it, Toguro!

Toguro: (Bruce Valance): Now, I'll get to see your true power

Shizuru from audience: (Cher): You monster!

Keiko (Britney Spears): No!

Yukina (Jennifer Lopez): Don't!

Botan: (Drew Barrymore): Oh Dear!

Hiei immediately slashed his sword across the overhead, making the pictures disappear. Everyone sighed, very relieved.

"What the heck was that?" Kuwabara demanded.

"That wasn't anything like us," Keiko added, "at all."

The producer shifted his eyes awkwardly and began rubbing his hand across his forearm.

"Well, you see, no offense, but…."

"But what?" Shizuru demanded.

"Well, you guys are kind of…lame."

A cold, awkward yet enraged silence fell between the producer and the fighters.

"'lame'?" Hiei repeated in disbelief, "You had a bald gnome with a French accent, and you're saying we're lame?"

Kurama frowned disapprovingly at the producer.

"I see this movie isn't to personify our victory after all, it was simply a money making scandal."

Yusuke scoffed.

"Exactly, sorry, but I won't sign anything to have this movie reach the public; not on your life."

The producer frowned.

"That was pure Hollywood material! You're just a bunch of nobodies!"

"I know," Hiei said, "not classy blonde actors who can't pronounce each other's names right."

Just as a heated argument was on it's way, the heavy door that led into the ring was opened, followed by grumbling.

"I still can't believe they let Juri go through the lost and found, there's good stuff in there and I-"

Koto, who had just entered the stadium, stopped to see a large number of people already there.

"Um," she looked around, "hi."

Yusuke was the first to smile.

"Hey, it's the fox girl from the tournament!"

Koto smiled, recognizing the best fighters she'd ever seen.

"Team Urameshi! Hi! Wow, what are you guys doing in Makai?"

Yusuke was about to say more when everyone heard a deep, loud growl. They glanced at the source of the noise, Hiei…

"Hiei, are you okay?" Yusuke asked.

Kurama's eyes widened.

"Uh-oh."

"Uh-oh?" Everyone else repeated.

"Hiei, can you hear me?" Kurama took Hiei by the shoulders, "It's just as I feared."

Koto shrugged, then turned back to Yusuke, wagging her tail as she happily told him how much she enjoyed announcing his team's victory.

"Stop that at once!" Kurama shouted, "Please, don't wag your tail!"

Koto looked up at him.

"Why?"

"It's Hiei," Kurama replied, holding Hiei down as the smaller demon growled and snarled, "he's in mating season."

Everybody gasped, then Kuwabara and Yusuke broke out into an enormous fit of laughter. They fell to the floor, pounding the ground with their fists as they gasped for air between roaring, foot-stomping, hearty roars.

"Did you just say mating season?" Yusuke squeaked between his laughs.

Kurama nodded.

"This is serious, Yusuke, when Hiei enters mating season and smells a female demon-he's no longer in a conscious state of mind! He could hurt someone," Kurama cast a finger at Koto, "someone like that girl!"

Koto's ears went down and she began to back away slowly.

"Um, c'mon, that little guy? Surely-ahhh!!!!!"

With a vicious snarl, Hiei bit Kurama, ripped himself from the taller demon's grasp, and tore after Koto in a mad frenzy. Snarling and growling as he leapt onto her.

"Ahhhhhhh!!!!!! Somebody, help!" Koto screamed, trying to push Hiei away.

Yusuke stopped laughing and raced over. He reached for Hiei, but the little demon quickly turned a bit Yusuke's hand.

"He bit me!" Yusuke cried.

"Oh dear," Kurama said uneasily, then he had a plan.

Pulling his rose from behind his hair, Kurama transformed it into a whip. He cracked it, then twirled it in the air.

"Rose whip!"

It lassoed around Hiei's ankle, then with a small tug, Kurama pulled him back.

Koto, frazzled, breathing heavily, and her tail wagging out of pure fear, crawled behind Yusuke.

"It's a monster!"

Yusuke sighed.

"I think you should leave, Koto."

Koto frowned.

"But I was eavesdropping on the movie, and it sucked, I wanna make a Dark Tournament movie-out of pure, 100 percent real footage."

Yusuke smiled.

"Really?"

Kurama frowned.

"Yusuke!"

Botan, who had wanted a movie as well, shook Koto's hand.

"Then it's settled, Miss Koto will make us a film!"

If things couldn't get any worse for poor Kurama, Juri walked in eating a bag of cookies.

"Hey, Koto," she called," do you know what time Trading Spaces comes on? I wanna watch it and-"

Hiei sniffed again, then snarled. With one gigantic chomp, he bit the Rose whip in half, then tore after the water demon.

Koto gasped.

"Oh no, Run, Juri! For the love of God, Run!"

Juri, completely confused, looked around, then chewed thoughtfully on another cookie.

"Why?"

Hiei, like a bat demon, made an aerial attack and tackled her.

"Because of that!" Koto finally said.

Hiei began licking Juri's face. Juri screamed, trying to pry him off.

"Help me, Koto!"

Koto stood up, patted the dirt off her bottom with her hands, then retrieved her ribbon she had used to pull Juri out of a tight spot before.

"Okay, here I come, Juri!"

She swung the ribbon and it caught hold of Hiei instead. He glanced at the ribbon wrapped around his ankle, growled, then tugged it, bringing Koto to him.

To Be Continued….

Author's note: Sorry I couldn't spell the actor's names very well! Anywho, please R&R. It'd make me feel special!


	2. Night One

Chapter 2: Night One

"So, you gave Koto and Juri their own apartment here in human world?" Kurama asked Botan, panicked.

Botan nodded.

"They said they need us to frequently view what they've done so far, so they needed to be close, but don't worry so much, Kurama, they're half across town."

Kurama sighed uneasily and glanced at Hiei from the corner of his eye. Hiei was currently watching Nickelodeon with Hana (I gave Kurama an eight-year old little stepbrother).

"Very well," he finally told her, "if you say so."

That night, as Koto and Juri were spreading out their futons in their temporary apartment, Koto smiled.

"This is terrific! We're actually making a movie of the Dark Tournament! Real footage!"

Juri shrugged.

"Whatever, just as long as I get to be close to the great Urameshi-hehehe! He's so adorable!"

Koto frowned.

"What do you mean?"

Secretly, Koto had the hots for Yusuke, and had been infatuated with him for a long time. She often dreamed of she and Yusuke on a sandy beach holding hands, laughing and running without a care in the world.

Juri snuggled into her futon.

"Urameshi's so handsome, don't you think so, Koto?"

Koto wriggled her nose.

"I have for a long time, long before you even came around," she replied, hinting her uneasiness towards the subject.

Juri had no right to her Yusuke! Yusuke hadn't saved her from Risho! In fact, Yusuke had probably never even spoke three words to her.

"Let's just go to sleep," she said bitterly.

As Hiei was climbing onto the top bunk of the bunk-beds he and Kurama shared, he smelled….demon females.

In a flash, he was no longer thinking. His pupils were the size of pen-points. His hands shook and wriggled out of control.

He growled.

"Hiei, are you alright?" Kurama asked, sitting up.

A loud, hissing snarl came in reply.

Hiei sprang from the bed, opened the bedroom window, and dove out.

Kurama quickly hopped out of bed and looked out.

"Hiei, stop!"

He bit his bottom lip as Hiei violently tore down the street, growling and snarling.

Koto and Juri were just starting to fall asleep, when a blur suddenly crashed through their window, shattering glass everywhere.

They screamed.

"Who's there?" Koto asked, sitting up.

They heard sniffing from the figure, then a deep growl.

The demon girls exchanged uneasy glances.

"Hey, Koto?"

"Yah, Juri?"

"Did that sound like the little troll from earlier today?"

The growl was closer.

"You mean Hiei?"

"Yah, him."

Koto suddenly screamed when something licked her ear. She sprang into action, reaching for the light switch.

"Koto, what's the mat-"

Juri let out a blood-curdling cry herself as she was suddenly forced to the ground by an extremely strong pair of hands. The owner was inhaling her scent, then he kissed her, hard.

The lights came on, and Koto screamed again. Hiei, dressed in his pajamas, was swapping spit with her friend!

"Ahhhh!!!!!! You nasty little pervert!"

Hiei spun around and began to breath heavily, his shoulders rising and falling with each inhale and exhale. Koto's tail, out of pure fear, had begun wagging subconsciously. Because of her tail wagging, she gave off more of a female demon scent, and the faster it wagged, the stronger it became, which made Hiei's breathing and growling grow louder.

He released Juri, and growled in Koto's direction.

Koto began backing up.

"Stay back, I uh, got a broom!" She said, grabbing the first thing she could find.

Hiei snarled and leapt at her, snapping the broom in two with his teeth. Koto shrieked as he crashed upon her, sending her to the floor.

He pinned both of her arms above her head and began smelling her chest. Koto's tail wagged harder.

"Ahh!!!! Juri, save me!!!!!!!"

Juri grabbed her pillow and hurled it at Hiei. He turned around and practically hissed, then he leaned back down to his captured prey and began licking her face.

"Ahh!!! Sick! Get him off me!"

Juri, panicked and scared, felt her own tail begin to wag.

Hiei stopped licking Koto's cheeks, sniffed the air, and slowly turned towards the water demon.

"Koto, I'm scared!"

"Quick, Juri! Throw something at him!"

Juri began scanning the room for something to clobber the small horny creature, when he lunged at her. She moved just in the knick of time.

"The bathroom!" Koto screamed.

The fox demon grabbed her friend's hand and high-tailed it into the bathroom, slamming the door on Hiei's face.

They were both breathing heavily.

"What are we going to do, Koto?"

"I have no idea, shh, hold on."

Koto pressed her ear to the door, listening for snarling or heavy breathing. She heard nothing.

"I think he's gone," she whispered.

Little did she know, Hiei was doing the exact same thing on the opposite side of the door. Juri sighed.

"Let's not risk finding out, I say we sleep in here."

"Good idea."

"Suichi!" Hana screamed, racing into his big brother's room, "Hiei's gone-"

He stopped in his tracks when he saw his brother was nowhere in sight as well. He frowned, crossed his small arms, and tapped his foot.

"I'm always left out," he muttered, "always!"

He already knew Kurama and Hiei's secret, but he also knew that they secretly were against him because he was younger. He knew they probably hid an anti-eight year old club somewhere. When he wasn't around, they probably talked about how stupid and worthless he was.

Koto, curled up on the floor, and Juri stretched out in the tub, waited for any sign that Hiei was still in their home.

"I think it's okay ahhhh!!!!!!"

The door handle from the other side was suddenly ripped off, and a hand came through to finish the job. Koto and Juri hugged onto each other for dear life, screaming as Hiei stepped in…

To Be Continued….


	3. The Attack

Chapter 3: The Attack

author's note: I've finally updated (Miss Aliesha Fisher) Anywho, hope you enjoy!

"Ahh!" Koto and Juri hugged onto eachother, ready for the end.

Hiei snarled at them, sniffed the air, and swiped at them like a raging animal. As the girls stumbled about the tub, trying to dodge the demon, Koto tripped, grabbing onto something for balance. As she did so, Juri fell and took hold of the faucet handle. Hiei suddenly stumbled backwards as water shot towards him, spraying from the adjustable shower head Koto was holding. He screamed and hissed, thrashing about, blindly waving his arms around for anything.

"Koto," Juri exclaimed in a mixture of shock and happiness,"you did it! How did you know?"

Koto was lost for words, but she continued to shoot Hiei with water. Juri began to adjust the water temperature from cold to scortching hot. That sent Hiei out of the bathroom. Koto released the shower sprayer and sighed. She placed a hand to her heart and breathed heavily. Juri hugged onto her leg.

"What do we do, Koto?"

"I say we don't leave this bathroom until the little freak is gone."

They both relaxed again, but kept the shower head next to them. They were side by side, slightly damp in the tub, sitting, waiting, fearing the heated demon, for he could be anywhere in the apartment. They listened. It became silent, other than the girl's breathing, and their eyes were growing heavy with sleep. Juri yawned and leaned on Koto's shoulder.

"Juri," Koto mumbled sleepily," we can't fall asleep. Hiei could be..."

She closed her eyes and leaned on Juri, her grip loosening on the shower sprayer. Their anxious breathing became light snoring. Juri awoke to a tickling feeling on her cheek. She giggled slightly as her eyes opened slightly, and then she screamed bloody murder. Koto shot up. Hiei was on top of Juri, pinning her down and licking her face, moaning slightly. She frantically took hold of her shower sprayer and gripped the button tightly, however, no water emitted.

"What the?"

Her heart fell to her stomach when she realized she was only holding part of the sprayer. It had been chewed away from the shower head!

"Koto," Juri squealed, "Get him off me!"

The fox girl stepped out of the tub and raced towards the doorway. She was trembling with fear, but she had to be brave!

"Hey, munchkin, want some of this?"

She turned around and shook her rear at him, her tail swishing from side to side. Hiei raised his head from Juri's face, sniffed the air, and slowly turned around. He growled deep in his throat in Koto's direction. The fox girl gulped and took off running crying, "Get out of here, Juri!" over her shoulder.

Hiei was far too fast and tackled her in her tracks. He straddled on top of her back and with one hand, pinned her arms behind her, and with the other, he ran through her short arburn hair. Koto screamed and thrashed.

Meanwhile, Juri dug around in the kitchen cabinet looking for something to strike Hiei with. She finally settled on a good-sized frying pan and quietly, though shakily, snuck into the living room where Hiei had found a nearby belt and bound Koto's hands behind her back. He was on top of her stomach now, kissing her heavily. The water demon tip-toed up behind him and raised the pan. Closing her eyes, she swung it down, but the demon, without even looking, grabbed her wrist. Juri gasped and played tug-of-war with him.

"Juri," Koto struggled under the small demon, go find something else! And hurry!"

Hiei swung Juri backwards and went back to his prey. Juri rubbed her bottom and stood up. She eyed the room for anything, but settled on everything. Anything she could throw, she threw. However, Hiei continued to whack them away without even looking in her direction. He purred in Koto's ear, making it flicker slightly. Koto finally resulted to biting him, her small pointy teeth sinking into his flesh. He let out a terrible scream and withdrew, clutching his arm. Koto rolled herself away, against the wall, and squirmed her way up.

"Juri, untie me!" She commanded.

Her friend nodded and raced over to Koto, stepping over the agonized Hiei in the process, and undid the tightly knotted belt from Koto's wrists. Hiei lapped at his wound, as if he didn't even notice the girls. In fact, tears suddenly cam to his eyes and he looked around slowly.

"Kurama?" He asked quietly, almost like a little boy who had just awoken from a bad dream.

Koto and Juri eyed eachother uneasily. They were huddled in the corner, a fork in Juri's hand. As if on cue, Kurama came through the door and spotted Hiei. He was panting. Hiei eyed him questioningly. His older "brother" knelt down beside him and asked, "Do you remember anything?"

Hiei shook his head and gazed at the bite mark on his arm.

Juri sniffled.

"Your creepy friend snuck in and attacked us," she sobbed, "look at our living room!"

Koto began to cry too.

"Our living room! Try the bathroom!"

They sobbed loudly, hugging onto eachother. Kurama approached them and bowed in apology.

"I'm terribly sorry," he said, "Hiei was not in a conscious state. He smelled your demon hormones and his, er, instincts overpowered his mind."

"You mean like sleep-walking?" Juri whimpered, peeking around Kurama to stare at Hiei.

"Yes," Kurama approached the small demon and wrapped an arm around him, "Something like that. Anyway, I'd suggest returning to Makai. It is not safe-"

Koto interruppted him.

"No way! I promised Urameshi an excellent documentary! And I'm not leaving until he stares at me and says, 'Koto, I lov-' I mean, 'That was the best damned movie I ever saw'!"

Juri stared at her in utter horror.

"But Koto..."

"No buts, if you have to go, Juri, then leave, but I'm not budging!"

Kurama sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Miss Koto, it would really be best-"

"I'm staying too," Juri interjected, "I'd never leave Koto alone. Besides, I've always wanted to be a good announcer, as good as Koto even, and she told me that if you can't stand the heat, then get out of the kitchen."

Koto and Juri clasped hands. Koto realeased one hand, however, to lean down and pick up her microphone-an item Juri had tossed at Hiei. She clicked it on and her voice echoed.

"Alright, Juri, can you take the heat?"

She held the device to Juri.

"Yes I can, Koto, I'm not leaving this kitchen," Juri said leaning into the microphone.

Kurama slapped his hand on his face. He then looked at Hiei and whispered, "I guess I just have to keep a better eye on you, then."

To Be Continued...

Author's note: Hooray, Another Chappie! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in many moons! And be prepared, Hiei gets trickier!

BTW, I'd like to thank Miss Alisha Fisher (spelled correctly?) for emailing me and hounding me to continue


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